いっつも、最後の最後、救われる。

It may be that I tend to work much harder for something when it gets down to the very last moment where I could still make it work out fine, or that I have this strange knack for being saved right before I fall into a serious problem (it's happened three times in the last year).

Whatever it might be, I have a new job!!

Mind you it's a temporary job, but six months is a decent length for a temporary job, especially when you're working for the state, get paid 25% more than where you're currently working, are guaranteed full time hours at the SAME time every day every week (no more working weekends for me!), and aren't hassled/disciplined for feeling too sick to come to work every once in a great while. Bonus: I get to feel like I'm helping out with the election! Whee! I'll be entering and updating information in their voter registration database. I had a feeling I did all right with the interview, especially when they made sure they had my work references before I left and the guy told me I did a good job (I swear he said that to me as I was leaving, but I can't remember for certain). They said they'd call me whether they chose me or not. The lady who interviewed me called and left a message on my phone today, but just told me to call her back about the job. My mom does exactly that when she has good news for me - she waits for me to hear it in person. ^^

Now I don't have to worry about making it to Courtney's wedding. phew.

All I have to do is negotiate new hours with my current job, or if they don't like that idea, I'll quit. bam. I get very little notice with just about everything I do there, so I don't think they can really expect a lot of notice out of me. On the plus side, next week was the week I took five days off for my brother's wedding anyway, so it's rather like two weeks' notice with just a few days they need to find someone else to work, because I can work through Sunday.

I think I'll just quit, actually. 40 hours is enough to work in one week. Originally I planned to renegotiate hours because the new job was only going to be 8-10 weeks long, but now that it's 6 months I really don't see the point, especially when I'm so adamant about having weekends off (which is really the only time I could work, or evenings, but they have a ton of people for that already).

In other news, I went home to visit my parents this past weekend, and saw my brother and sister, picked up a lot of my things (and found out my sister stole a bunch more things I bought in Japan and lied to me about it), and brought my dress for my brother's wedding home for my mom to alter. Dave's birthday is on Saturday, and we will be going apple picking this weekend, which I am VERY excited for. I love eating apples, have loved picking apples since I was a little kid, and introducing people to it last year was really fun too. :D My brother is getting married in a week and a half, and now I have a new job to tell people all about while I'm there and I won't sound like I'm still the bum I was a year ago. I have to figure out how I want my hair done (and now I don't have to worry about how much I'll spend on it because I have a decent job). I'm thinking curls, but since my hair is in so many layers now I don't know how well that will work. And, down or up? Up is more formal, but I think down just looks better on me. I also had the JLPT study group today, and got a bit of insight into Ross' character that doesn't really come through when we're talking in Japanese. I can see how Fred would think it's annoying, but I'll learn to deal with it instead of just getting frustrated.

Knowing I don't have to search for jobs for a while any more will make me so much happier than I've been...

thank you

Lots of people this year think about what they're thankful for, and I'm no different. add me to the pile. in fact, I'm happy about probably the same thing a lot of other people are. but they don't know the people I know, so it's still special.

I'm not as stubborn or motivated as I used to be, and I'm working on getting that back because I feel like part of me is gone without it. That nagging feeling that says you should get up and do something? That's been gone for so long. I have wasted a lot of time.

I have a big family and I already know that all of us have lots of different interests but I have also learned (especially since coming to live with someone who is not my family, not yet anyway, but knows it well) that all of us have a similar vein. I found that it's much stronger than I thought. They care. a lot. more than their job, in some cases. We're just not that vocal. I take my family saying nothing to mean that they don't really care that much, and that they do things for me or say nice things because they feel like they have to and not necessarily because they want to help me or make me feel good.

In fact, I don't really even believe a whole lot of people when they say nice things, but when they offer criticism, I take it straight to heart. How did I get so messed up? I think I've surrounded myself with the kind of people where a great many of them mean what they say, or they wouldn't say it...and yet I deflect pretty much everything but the criticism they give me.

I'm happy that I have so many people who are willing to support me even if I'm being difficult, or don't completely believe what they say about me. Without them I would be in a cardboard box on the street. I'm glad for the friends I have that don't give up on me when I'm being stupid. There are more people looking out for me and interested in knowing how I'm doing than I thought there were. they are all people that are important to me.

if I can ever return the favor, let me know.

in terms of the holiday feast, I am excited. Jenny is brining the turkey (basically soaking it in a mixture of salt water and spices for a whole day) and making most of the food, and it will be different from my mom's, so I'll get to try some new things! I made a pumpkin pie a couple of hours ago, and squash soup yesterday (it's so thick it turned out more like pudding...), but that will probably be the extent of my cooking because she wants to do it herself. Zach is happy as long as he gets food. We'll make him peel potatoes or something. :D

Base Ball Bearの「愛してる」

This song has been stuck in my head ALL DAY. I watched the PV (it has subtitles!) and I must say it's the most awesome song I've heard in a while. It's iffy as to whether it's REALLY a happy song or not, but it certainly sounds happy enough. The video is probably the most entertaining Japanese music video I've ever seen. It's funny because they take off their coats...then start singing "I love you..." and nonchalantly taking their clothes off. The irony of it is that it's not dirty. I laughed. Especially when the drummer unzips his pants...to reveal a flesh colored pair of pants. Horinouchi is such a tease. :P

Another thing I really like about it is that Shiori sings more than the backup vocals! Surprise solo :D She also smiles toward the end of the video, something she really doesn't do much. And the English at the very end was also hilarious. I think the subtitles are on the original video, but if I'm wrong, and a fan did the ones on there, they did all right.

As for the Japanese lyrics, I felt like typing them out, so here they are. The real ones that come out with the single (which comes out on Halloween, 10/31, in a week and a half or so) may look slightly different. I JUST FOUND OUT THE SINGLE WILL HAVE KARAOKE ON IT. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :D
not to mention a "Shiori Rockets version". Maybe she sings more in it? :)
I may just buy this single.

==============================
愛してる / Base Ball Bear

初めての「愛してる」で　君はちょっと悲しい目をしていた
喜んでくれると思っていたのに　隙間風が吹いた　そんな気さえもしたんだ
漠然とプレゼントみたいに思っていた　男の子な発想とは yeah

愛してる（愛してる）　愛してる（愛してる）
君を間違いはないはず　君と歩んでいきたいはず
愛してるはず

３度目の「愛してる」で　君は僕を嫌いになったと告げた
本当なんだと繰り返す僕は　何かが違うような　そんな気がしていたんだ
親友と焼酎で広げる恋愛論理　フューチャーもアンサーもないや　ないや

愛してる　愛してる　愛してる
君を間違いはないはず　君と歩んでいきたいはず
愛してるはず

その言葉を口にするたびに　愛が逃げてく気がする
愛は形のないものだから　似ているものを　そう　僕の心あげる

愛してる　愛してる
愛してる（愛してる）　愛してる（愛してる）
愛してる　yeah

愛してる（愛してる）　愛してる（愛してる）
愛してる　君を間違いはないはず　君と歩んでいきたいはず
愛してるはず　はず・・・多分・・・はず

==============================

In other news, Mother Nature is unleashing her wrath onto the Northwest...it's been pouring rain one minute and hailing the next, windy as hell, and it's even poured while the sun was shining. But no rainbow. She's not happy. Stupid ocean. AND the foundation of the house is leaking water into the basement, as Jenny found out when she came home for lunch and went downstairs to get something to eat. JOY.

We're going out for dinner tonight! Yay for Thai food. :) I want something with coconut milk in it. Ty is having a birthday party of sorts tonight and I hope he has fun. I was going to hook up the camera in here and call to the party, but I need my brother's password to do it, and I don't think he'd give that to me. damn. oh well. I miss my friends back home, that's all.