tea time and reconnection

March has almost completely left us behind, but a lot has happened, and I feel like I'm getting back into my groove. I was pretty down for the first half of the month or so, and it was hard to look for jobs. People don't want to hire people that don't believe in themselves. I had a few interviews but nothing really worked out.

Ty's giant surprise for our third anniversary was pretty awesome. I didn't like being blindfolded for an hour while we were driving (Harry Potter audio books kept me entertained), but after I found out we were spending a day at an indoor water park I felt much better. XD I mean, who doesn't like to stand under a giant bucket that drops 700 gallons of water on you, and ride on giant water slides? Even the ones that weren't so giant were fun. It was a much-needed escape from reality, and made me remember who I was.

Although I ended up falling into my old mood right when I got back, I was able to snap out of it. For some reason Ty was able to get through to me. I'm not going to get a job with a depressing attitude, sitting on the couch, and he came with me to drop off applications that I would have waited on. I think that was what did it, and made me realize that you can't wait on things forever either, or nothing will get done.

Since last week was spring break for the college students, I was able to meet up with two friends that would have otherwise been insanely busy, and we had tea. Kiyomi is one of those rare Japanese people that actually means what she says, so you can actually talk seriously with her. I completely agree with her that it's really sad that we have such a good Japanese program here, but graduates have such a difficult time finding jobs where they can use Japanese, especially when they decide to stay in the United States - even if they have second majors to support it. It made me feel better knowing that I wasn't the only one struggling with that situation. I know the East Asian Studies chair holds an annual information session where people discuss career paths after graduation, but I went to it, and it didn't help that much. Basically, all they said was that if you want to get a job in the country of your choice, get an English teaching job. It's pretty much the only freaking job you can get in Japan if you're foreign and straight out of college, unless you're lucky.

I really want to help the current Japanese majors understand the main roads, actually. True, after college it's up to you what you want to do with your life, and I feel like the Japanese department doesn't want to get involved in people's personal choices, but I felt SO LOST when I graduated. If they just had an information session about jobs or something, I think it would help them out a lot. It's not forcing them into anything; it's just letting people know possible options.

In any case, talking with her made me feel much better, and I felt like I have my own life, what with going to see a friend and not tagging along with my boyfriend. Coffee or tea was about the one luxury I could afford with what money I had left.

I also went to meet Mariko for tea on Easter Sunday, and although we originally planned to go to a café, I thought it would probably be closed (being a holiday and all), so we went to the 5th floor of the Biochemistry building instead. Mariko was really busy with research there, and there's a kitchen! I hadn't seen her for an entire year. She sounds on track with what she wants to do after she graduates in December, but she's a bit disappointed. She wants to go back to Japan for grad school, but there are no programs in Japan for what she wants to study because it's so new, so she has to stay in the United States, and she'll be so busy that she won't get to go back to Japan 4 times a year like she does now. However, her last semester won't be very busy, so she says once summer starts, she'll be able to hang out more. We're still going to get together for tea again soon because the biochemistry building is convenient for her, and it's free :)

Lastly, I landed a part-time job earlier this week! All the people there seem awesome. Training and orientation is today ^^ Luckily the man I interviewed with was the same cheerful man I talked to on the phone when I scheduled the interview, and the format was the best kind for me: just having a conversation and trying to get a feel for what the other person is like, not asking all those cold, impersonal questions. They were asked, yes, but it was in a much more friendly, congenial way. I'm excited.

Lastly, I woke up this morning and I saw that a friend of mine from studying abroad was on, and I talked to her for the first time in about two years. She's Thai and just got a job at Bridgestone (the tire company) as a Thai<->Japanese interpreter at a factory. She says it's really hard. Interpreting is not easy, after all. I know she'll do well ^^

OK, work starts soon. I'm out.

shiori + hori-kun + me

This morning I went on a search for Base Ball Bear stuff, trying to find interesting tidbits. I found a lot of cool pictures, and some CD reviews from 4-5 years ago that have a more detailed biography of their earlier history (most of the newer ones shorten it up a lot, I guess because recent happenings are more important). The best thing was an interview from a few months ago, with a "top three things you're into right now" for each of the members. Normally I'm most interested in Shiori's stuff, but after watching a few Richard Dawkins documentaries, it seems kind of dumb, like she's just caught up in alternative healing scams at the moment. I hope aromatherapy and Yomeishu aren't eating up all of the money she makes playing her guitar. (Yomeishu is an alcoholic herbal drink made with Chinese medicinal herbs. Part of me thinks it would just taste awful, but I'm also curious to try it just to see what it's like. It costs about $22 per liter, so a little on the expensive side. At least it's not homeopathic and actually has viable amounts of herbs though...)

I think it's good that Hori-kun is on a diet...and he uses Billy Blanks tapes to exercise! hee. I remember doing those in gym in middle school. Oh, good times.

Job hunting is going all right. If I accept the job that randomly came up yesterday, I may be doing some interpreting at a hospital later this month. However, I'm not confident, especially with the last time I tried to interpret at a hospital, and that was really informal. Lots more pressure this time.

I finished the first story in Novala Takemoto's book Emily recently, and I'm about 33% done translating it. The story is only about 12 pages long, but hey, you have to start small with literature because the author is not always blunt, like in a newspaper. I need to get myself a denshi jisho, badly. I'm borrowing one from a friend right now and I never realized just how useful and convenient they are.

one big circle

Guess where I am now? That's right! Right back where I started ten months ago! Well, a few blocks away, but in the same city. Yes, Madison. and this time I'm not sitting on my butt waiting for something to happen. I don't know if I said that before, but the people here will not let me do that.

I got here Saturday and had my first interview today at the gelato store! Not bad if I do say so myself. :) But I'm not stopping there. There are lots of applications to fill out yet. If I don't get a job bad things are going to happen to me, so I really, REALLY need one. I applied to Jamba Juice and the bead store too. Ty wants me to work at Jamba Juice because he says I'll smell REALLY good when I come home.

My tax returns are very nice this year, but I won't get that for a while, and I'm saving it when I do, along with that economic relief money if I'm supposed to get it. That's not what they want me to do, but I'm sure for every person that saves it, there will be two more that spend it and then some because they think they have more than they do.

Me? I just want to be able to go to my brother's wedding in October...even if I get bitter just thinking about him. He's my brother, and I need to get over it. Once I start making my own way I think it'll be fine. That and when he isn't so damn stressed out.

So what else is going on lately, you say...
- Apparently Evan is teaching Steve's class for a week or so because Steve's wife is going to have a baby very, very soon. びっくり.
- I want to go to the St. Patrick's Day parade again! Last year was so fun ^^ March 16, guys. I'm getting together all the people I can.
- Every time I get to the intersection of Gorham and Wisconsin I look up to Gilman St. and wish Sarah was still around. Apparently Brian does too, from what he told me yesterday...ehe.
- I made a nice purse out of black wool, and finished it last night while the guys recorded a new song. I WOULD have had it done sooner if I hadn't spaced out and sewed the outside of the bag on inside out. Since the fabric is the same on both sides, it was easy to confuse. That and I got really angry at Cooper because he pulled one of the straps off the basement table and chewed a hole in the side of it the night before I moved.

And that's all. Time to make some dinner. :D

a glimmer of hope

I'm finally getting somewhere with this ball of emotion that I've been carrying for so long inside. It was like a big mess of tangled yarn. I've finally untangled the knots and started rolling it up in a nice organized ball, with a little help from Ty.

I've decided to try to get a job in Madison, and it will not necessarily be a translating job, but if it isn't, I can still translate in my free time. My goal at this point is to get something that will LEAD to a translating job because I can't get past the preliminary stages of job hunting with translation jobs. If it's at a Japanese company, that would be good too.

I've just gotten back from a fairly long visit to Madison, and it really gave me a boost. Last Saturday, right after my class finished, Ty picked me up and we drove to Madison. It took longer than normal because of the snow. I saw more cars stuck in the ditches than I ever have in one trip in my life. It almost happened to us, actually, but luckily there was nobody behind us to crash into, and all we did was end up spinning 180 degrees onto the shoulder, and a police car came up to keep the incoming traffic far enough away for us to turn around and get back on the road. That's not to say I wasn't really scared.

Upon our safe arrival, Ty covered my eyes and brought me into the room, and when I opened them, I saw a little amp and a red bass guitar, with a red paper heart tucked between the strings. It was cute. I can practice any time I want now ^^ I was surprised I was getting it for a present. ^^

Later that night was Evan's party. We were going to walk, but it was VERY cold and far away. We took a bus part of the way, and even though we could have walked just as quickly, it was MUCH warmer. I ran into Helena (a friend of Mami's that I met last year) and she thought Ty and I were brother and sister. Seriously. I only get that from Koreans, you know. I was looking forward to talking with the Japanese TAs, and although Atsuhase (as he is known to some) was very sick and couldn't make it, I spent a lot of time talking with Kawakami-san. I was happy to find that my Japanese isn't completely degenerating. I talked to her about how I was doing with finding a job, and we talked about relationships and the other people in the Japanese department. Apparently she's the only TA that thinks socializing with your students is OK, and that all the other teachers look down on her for it, but she doesn't care, and she says it's because she is, first and foremost, a student herself - she feels she shouldn't miss out on that whole opportunity for friendships just because she's a different kind of student. A while ago I would have never guessed she's the department's black sheep of sorts, but knowing how Japanese people do their thing, I'm glad she's not suppressing things she feels strongly about...because when you leave, you're not going to remember your harmonious work environment, but what you did to make your own life worthwhile. Since that party was at the Japanese House and our good friend Phillips-san lives there, and he was kind enough to stay up for a bit and socialize, we played Rock Band. The vocals are a lot trickier than the guitar, but it was really fun belting out Weezer and spending some time with someone I don't normally get to see. Best party I've been to in a long time.

Sunday was pretty lazy except for grocery shopping with Aki, and while we were in the store we ran into Brock, whom I hadn't seen in ages. He has a job, is thinking about going back to school, and broke up with Mariko but is still living with her because they signed a lease. Oh well. I made cookies too. You'd never think to make cookies out of cake mix, but they're surprisingly good. I had coffee with Molly on Monday and went shopping (for beads...spent $1), did some research for a presentation in my translation theory class, and crashed the spring job fair at the Kohl Center. While I was there, I ran into lots of people I knew and got interviewed for a newspaper. Oops. Thankfully the interviewer was someone I knew ^^

Tuesday was a pretty full day - I went to visit with one of my former professors and was a guest in his class. He teaches modern Japanese literature, and I translated a story by one of the authors he covers, and asked me to come in and read it to his class. I got to talk with him about it a little more in detail and that made me feel even better about it, and one guy in the class suggested I submit it to a magazine if I want to get it published. Maybe I will :) I also found out that Geyer-sensei is going to have a baby (!) Afterward I was going to have lunch with Tracie, but she had forgotten and already brought her lunch to work. She told me to come in anyway to visit, and I had quite a warm welcome and was given things to eat ^^ Maddy's going to Germany for six months! I'm jealous. Tracie wants to move to Oklahoma with her boyfriend (he lives here, but his parents are CRAZY, so I can see why he wants to get away) and go to nursing school...I hope it works out despite her parents not wanting her to go. I was wondering what to do next when Ty calls and says he and Molly want to skip their class, and they came to meet me. We played video games and talked a while, and then while Ty went to tae kwon do, Molly and I rented Stardust and made dinner. Stardust is VERY ridiculous, in a good way. I have never laughed so much watching a fantasy movie.

Yesterday I was supposed to go home, and waited all day to go. I had some avocado toast in there...avocados taste similar to egg yolk, I think. It was good though. I also tried chocolate covered espresso beans, which were better than I expected. After Ty got home and we talked a bit, we decided it would have been really hard for him to drive me home and get back so late (especially on an empty stomach...he'd have been really crabby), so I decided to stay until morning, and we went out on a date instead. Yay for Glass Nickel pizza and beer. I love that place so much. Then we went on a quest for raspberry ginger ale because I remembered drinking pink ginger ale when I was very little and he said they still make it...but it was sold out. :( We got raspberry soda and ginger ale and mixed them instead, and it was fairly close. ^^

I came home this morning and it has just snowed and snowed and snowed all day. Cooper got neutered today too, and he was a little loopy when he came home, but he seems pretty much back to his old self now. Tomorrow I'm going to take a test at the library as a preliminary interview-type thing. Too bad it's going to be horribly cold out...

I just can't believe I'm so lucky. I had a really good time this past week. I love the people I'm surrounded with. I don't know why I get so discouraged sometimes. I just have to remember that I have a lot to be happy about, even if I don't feel like it all the time.

creative paradise

Two sites that are worth checking out if you like unique handmade things: Etsy and DaWanda. People sell their handmade jewelry, art, clothes, and other accessories. If I had enough money and had less of a creative spirit I would buy a lot of things from here. Maybe someday I'll even sell my things from one of these. ^^

life in a deep freeze

Another month goes by, and I'm still without work. Go figure. I've been thinking a lot about it, though, and somehow I feel closer to knowing my options. All I have to do is decide which way I want to go. Since I had nearly no guidance at all in terms of career planning relating to what I want to do and how to go about it, I'm probably going to write up something for new graduates who studied Japanese and are looking for a job. Maybe it will help someone. In any case, it will let them know that the road is not exactly paved with sushi and Anime, even if you're in America. (thanks Molly for the inspiration :))

I've started attending a class at the technical college near my house called "Theory of Translation and Interpretation". It's surprisingly much more difficult and in-depth than I thought, and there are only nine people in the class, most of whom are older than me, so there's a lot of interesting discussion. You have to already have a bachelor's degree in order to take it, so in a way it's kind of like grad school. It's just a lot cheaper :) The teacher is originally from Cameroon, knows 11 languages, studied in many of the best translation schools in North America and translated for the government of Cameroon for a long time...so long story short, he's well qualified. I like how he talks too. He seems really happy to be teaching the material, and I like the sound of English spoken by African people. Unfortunately I don't do so well with theoretical-type classes, but I've decided that I will try as hard as I can since it's really the only thing I have going for me in terms of constructive life-skill-building activities at this point. I'm also needing to get in touch with the Japanese instructor at the school (amazingly they have one!), and although their Japanese classes certainly are nowhere near the intensity of the ones I took, I don't doubt that she could be a great resource for breaking into the Japanese community here. I thought there were no Japanese people here at all, but maybe she can help me find them. AND apparently she corrected my bilingual assessment and thought I did pretty well, so I've already made a decent impression. Yay :)

I've spent a lot of time taking care of Cooper too. He's mellowed out a bit since I first met him (AND we think he's potty-trained now) but there are some times where he's just been out of control. I do like him, though. He does a lot of quirky, funny things and he's very sweet.

I've occasionally visited Madison thanks to Ty coming to pick me up, but part of me feels a bit like I'm going there to escape doing something about getting a job, and I can't just relax and have fun. It makes me feel like any job at all would be better than this, even if it only paid minimum wage. Maybe if I tried harder while I'm home, I wouldn't feel so bad about going on "vacation". I think I'm just not trying hard because I don't know where I want to go...I don't have a clear concept of what I'm trying to do or where I'm trying to go with my life in the near future. But time is running out and I need to decide.

あたしの未来図をもうすぐ描かないと・・・。

happy 2008だよ

Or so it should be. I have a good number of things to be happy about. I think once I actually get a job or start with school (whichever comes first) I'll feel much better. So I'm going to talk only about the happy things.

I got home from Seattle just fine, and was especially feeling lucky after all the crap that my brother and Jenny had to put up with to get here and back. My suitcases were filled as full as they could go without being too heavy for the plane, and I sent a 17-pound box of crap home. Talk about good packing. I'm happy to be gone from there. My job at the candy store was the best thing about it. Living with my brother was more stressful for everyone involved than I think any of us thought it would be, and I've come to learn that my brother is awful about helping people out. He won't say no because he doesn't want to seem like a jerk, but when you bug him about actually helping you when he said he would, he feels like he's being taken advantage of. Just say no if you can't, and save everyone some freaking trouble and stress, because either way you're going to end up seeming like a jerk. Lesson learned: don't ask him for help. Ever.

Christmas was happy, mostly. I was happy to see my family again, and we did a lot of our traditional activities (except going to church, and my sister put everyone's feelings perfectly - she snapped her fingers, smiled and said 'darn!' in a lightly sarcastic tone :D). I got some awesome presents from Ty and my sisters and my parents.

Cooper is such a troublemaking little dog, and he got into his share of fights with Oscar while they were both here (mostly about food). But he's so warm and fuzzy and affectionate. My favorite thing about him is the way he tilts his head when he hears unfamiliar sounds or isn't sure what something is. It's SO CUTE.

I also like it when he smiles. :) he just got done playing with balloons when this picture was taken. I always thought it was dumb when people get dogs and that's all they ever take pictures of afterward, but they're really like part of the family in that way. I mean everyone takes pictures of their new babies, and puppies are sort of like babies.

I've been on vacation for a little while with Ty in Madison, visiting friends and doing fun things together. It's been really cold so we've been spending time mostly inside, cooking and playing Wii games and watching movies. We did go to a theater to see Sweeney Todd though, and it was amazing. There are lots of good actors, they're all decent singers, the songs can be funny and kind of catchy, and it keeps you interested. Although it's depressing (it is, after all, about a serial killer) it's wonderfully executed (haha, I made a funny...), the best example of this being that it doesn't drag on unnecessarily like a LOT of other movies I've watched lately. It's very concise, tells its story wonderfully, and then gets out of the way, but stays in your head.

Out of all the new video games Ty got for Christmas, the one I like most is Super Mario Galaxy. This is because I have had a special place in my heart for Mario games ever since I was born. My mom used to play them and she's pretty inept with any form of electronics. That's how cool Mario is. It's cute overload, what with all the stars and penguins and the bee suit and themed galaxies. Even the ones that are supposed to be scary are really cute. The scariest part of the game is not always knowing whether you'll be able to walk upside down on stuff or if you're going to fall off or float away into oblivion.

I've also been learning bass guitar, or attempting. Ty has been teaching me a few things. It's not as hard as I thought, at least once you learn the notes you need to play. I can't read music and I'm not good with recognizing notes by ear, but I'm sure if I work at it enough I'll be able to tell what each string is supposed to sound like if it's in tune. I learned to play a couple of Blue Hearts songs (and it was no coincidence that we'd just watched Linda Linda Linda before this). :)

Molly's New Year's Eve party was also really fun, although I had a little too much fun and had to spend the next day recovering. I STILL don't think my stomach is fully recovered. ehehe. Yesterday we threw a ramen party, which was a lot more fun than it sounds because I spent all day cooking the soup and base myself (noodles I KNOW I'd have screwed up so I bought some), and we had a lot of toppings for it. We couldn't find kamaboko so we used chikuwa instead (they're both a type of fish cake), and it reminded me of my host mother and how she used to fill the hole in the chikuwa log with cheese and serve it as part of meals. :) The meal itself was really good, and a success in that we got a lot of our friends to try new foods...like fish cake and miso and seaweed. And they liked it.

Today we go sledding on lunch trays down Bascom Hill after Ty and Molly are done with work. Somehow to me that just embodies the spirit of college. I never actually did it before I graduated, so I better do it now :)